MacBook On My Mind

The new MacBooks have been released into the wild and I want one. Everyone out there who reads this site, send me ten bucks so I can get myself a MacBook. Or just send me a MacBook. My current computer is a 500MHz G3 iBook with 256MB of RAM and a 10GB hard drive from 2001. It makes a great portable DVD player and paperweight. Other than that, it is a little out of date. The new MacBooks feature a 13.3-inch, 1280x800 pixel glossy display, Intel's Core Duo processor at speeds from 1.83 GHz to 2.0 GHz, up to 2GB memory, up to 120GB hard drive, an integrated iSight webcam, a remote control, gigabit Ethernet, WiFi and Bluetooth. The $1499 version also comes in shiny black. Of course I want the black one. Now I just have to figure a way to get fifteen hundred bucks. I could pimp myself out, but I don't think my girlfriend would appreciate that. I could rob a bank, but I don't have a gun or ski-mask and I could get five years in jail and a $500,000 fine for that. I don't have any rich relatives on their deathbed that I could inherit the money from. What's a poor boy to do? Any suggestions or donations would be greatly appreciated. E-mail me at limited[dot]ed[at]gmail[dot]com for where to send donations.

Update: the first person to send me a new MacBook or the money to buy one will receive a special prize of their choosing from my vast collection of Limited Ed. toys, shoes and artwork. They may also select to have their portrait or a painting subject of their choosing painted by me, a professional artist, in oil paint. What a deal!