Friday, September 01, 2006

Gayest Toy Ever!

Freddie Mercury figure

I try to be a good liberal and not say anything homophobic (yeah, right), but this has got to be literally the gayest toy ever. I mean, it's a Freddie Mercury figure from the band Queen [available at, featuring motion-activated sound]! The only way it could be more gay is if it were a Paul Lynde or Lance Bass figure. I would buy a Paul Lynde figure, though, if for nothing else than its kitsch appeal. But I'm not so sure about the Freddie Mercury figure. People might get the wrong idea if I had Freddie on my bedside table. And he's eighteen inches tall! That's way too big to fit up my ass!

I did have a mustache just like that at one point, though.


Setholonius said...

WAY too big to fit up your ass? Now you're just being modest.

Anonymous said...

I'll make you a ten inch one if that's what you want to do with it.