From the desk of Malcolm McLean: now you can get all of your monkey needs from monkeyneeds.com! This monkey breeding website has everything you need for your monkey... and the monkeys to go along with all of those accessories. Who wouldn't want an adorable pet monkey? I want two, so I can have monkey knife fights aboard my yacht in international waters.
On a completely related note, Lance Bass of N*Sync is gay!
Monkeys and gay Lance Bass on the same day, somebody pinch me!